You’re All Alone…

There you are, all alone on a sailboat.

The sea all around. Perfect wind to push your boat magically through the waves. Cutting over one and through the next as if you’re gliding above the surface.

The salt air, the sun, the calmness.

Below the crystal blue waters, the reef passing by underneath you.

It’s just another perfect day as you stand up looking out at the horizon, knowing the days ahead will be that of smooth sailing to a port where you will enjoy that glass of wine and fresh fruit.

When it happens, your pristine boat strikes a log that drifting just below the surface. That once perfect day now being filled with anxiety and fear as your boat begins to take on a steady stream of water.

It’s in this moment you have options.

• Completely freak out, grab your favorite belongings and jump overboard hoping another boat comes along.

• Sit and watch the water come in, filling the boat inch by inch. Accepting that this is “your time”…

• Calmly take in your surroundings, accepting that this was 100% unplanned for but life has you prepared for moments like this. Take out your tools and lean into the lessons you have learned and knowledge you have to overcome this new obstacle. Patch the hole, keep an eye on your work knowing it may crack a little and need a bit more help. While also knowing that you can do this. You can make it back to port where you will enjoy that wine and fruit. And in that time, do the work it takes to make the boat pristine once more.

Life is like that. It’s an adventure where you never truly know what is coming. You never know what tomorrow brings, you never know if you will even make it home for dinner.

The only thing you do have is YOU - Your heart, your courage, your strength, your lessons learned, your willpower, your magic, your shine! AND YOU SHINE SO F’ING BRIGHTLY!

You have COMPLETE control over how you react to “the log” that struck your boat. Whatever that log may be at the moment.

A flat tire, job loss, a broken bone, an annoying boss, an accident, relationship ending, illness… The list goes on.

You can do it though! You can make it through because YOU can take action to pivot this moment into something great. And if you know me at all, I HATE THE WORD PIVOT! In this moment though, it works. And you can do it. You have the ability, and you alone, to pivot this into something greater.

Flat tire, sit in the sun or grab a book while you wait for AAA to show up, or take this moment to prove to yourself you can put that spare on with your own hands.

Job loss, it was just a job, even a career. It doesn’t define you though, And heck, it was time to move on to something better. Even if you don’t know what that better is yet.

Broken bone? You needed that down time, didn’t you! That book you’ve wanted to read, new art you’ve wanted to learn, or show you’ve wanted to binge but know it’s not your normal to just sit in front of a TV.

There is truly good that can be found in almost every single situation life has for you. Outside of life ending, which, is never the option to go with. (And if you’re feeling that darkness, please know that ‘this too shall pass’ - and you have done it before and you’ll do it again, finding that light. Also, call 988 or call or text me 860.977.9926, or call your 8 minute friend. Just know you’re not alone.)

Embracing the unexpected is tough, I get it, I 100% get it. You are so resilient though, it’s part of what makes each one of us magic. Ya know?

What is it they say, there are few things in this life you can count on, but death, taxes and change are inevitable parts we should all expect. That’s not to say some changes don’t hit us harder than others, especially when they arrive without warning, like that log.

So in those turbulent waters and times, let’s go over five practical tips to help you handle life changes that catch you off guard.

1. Allow Yourself to Feel

When an unexpected change occurs, it’s natural to experience a whirlwind of emotions. Denying these feelings can lead to further stress and emotional complications. Allow yourself to grieve, to be angry, or to feel lost—it’s all part of the healing process. Acknowledging your emotions doesn’t mean you are weak; it means you are human. Sometimes, just recognizing how you feel

can provide a sense of relief and is the first step towards processing the change.

2. Seek Support

Trying to handle everything alone can be overwhelming. Reach out to friends, family, or professionals who can provide support and perspective. Sometimes, just talking about what has happened can help you find clarity and relief. Support groups, either in person or online, can also connect you with others going through similar experiences, ensuring you feel less isolated and more understood.

3. Establish a Routine

When life feels chaotic, a routine can bring a sense of normalcy and control. Start with simple tasks like regular meal times, exercise, and a consistent sleep schedule. Building structure in your day can help reduce anxiety and provide stable ground from which to address the bigger changes in your life. It also helps to prioritize tasks, breaking them down into manageable steps, which can make the overall situation feel less daunting.

4. Focus on What You Can Control

In the face of unexpected changes, it's easy to feel powerless. Focus on the aspects of your life that you can control, such as your reactions, decisions, and how you spend your time. This might mean setting new personal or professional goals, or it might involve smaller, everyday choices that improve your well-being. Remember, control starts with small, consistent actions.

5. Adopt a Growth Mindset

View these challenges as opportunities for growth. A growth mindset—the belief that you can improve and adapt through effort and learning—can be incredibly empowering in times of change. Ask yourself what you can learn from this experience and how it might actually contribute to your personal development. For instance, overcoming a tough situation often builds resilience, empathy, and strength, qualities that will serve you in all areas of life.

That’s enough for now…

Life’s surprises aren’t always pleasant, but teach one does carry valuable lessons. By allowing yourself to feel, seeking support, maintaining a routine, focusing on what you control, and adopting a growth mindset, you can not only manage unexpected changes but also turn them into opportunities for personal strength and growth.

Each challenge is a chapter in your story and navigating it successfully adds depth, character, and resilience to your life narrative.

I believe in you!

~Tim - out