No, not the kind with badges and binoculars.The kind that guards your peace, your time, and your sanity.Too many of us walk around with our emotional borders wide open, everyone’s energy, opinions, and needs flooding in without so much as a “passport, please.” We say yes when we mean no, we explain ourselves like we’re on trial, and then we wonder why we feel drained before Monday even starts. So today, you’ll find practical steps for setting boundaries that feel strong but kind, a journal thought to help you practice them, and maybe a few reminders that protecting your peace isn’t rude, it’s necessary.Because when you get good at border patrol, something beautiful happens. You stop managing everyone else’s comfort, and start honoring your own.Stay kind, stay grounded, and keep building the version of you that doesn’t need to be liked to be loved.Let's dive in!
They Don’t Have To Like You
THE DAY YOU BECOME OKAY WITH NOT BEING LIKED IS THE DAY YOU BECOME THE REAL YOU
Let’s be honest — most of us spend a good chunk of life trying to fit into molds that were never meant for us. We smooth out our edges, quiet our opinions, and say “sure, no problem” when everything in us is screaming actually, that’s a huge problem.
But something shifts when you stop chasing approval. The air gets lighter. You breathe easier. You start saying no without guilt, and yes without hesitation. That’s when the real you finally steps out from behind the curtain — unfiltered, unedited, unapologetically human.
Here’s the truth: not everyone’s going to like you. And that’s okay — they’re not supposed to. You’re not a pizza. (Even pizza doesn’t please everyone — someone always says it needs more cheese.)
So this week, try letting go of one small thing you’ve been doing just to be liked. It could be saying “yes” when you want to rest. It could be holding back your opinion in a conversation. Or maybe it’s that extra layer of “nice” that keeps you from being real.
Because the world doesn’t need another perfectly polite version of you.
It needs the honest, slightly messy, fully alive one.
This Week’s Journal Thought
What would change if you stopped trying to be liked and started trying to be real?
Write down one situation where you’ve been filtering yourself — and one way you can show up more authentically next time.
Its okay to protect yourself
Stop Explaining Your Boundaries
People who respect them will honor them. People who don’t, won’t.
At some point, “people-pleasing” got rebranded as “being kind.” But there’s nothing kind about abandoning yourself to make someone else comfortable.
Boundaries aren’t walls — they’re doors with locks. You decide who gets the key, when they can visit, and how long they can stay. The moment you stop feeling the need to explain your boundaries is the moment you realize they were never up for negotiation in the first place.
The truth? When you start setting healthy boundaries, some people will call you selfish. Others will call you cold. Let them. The ones who belong in your circle will simply nod and say, good for you.
So this week, try putting a little more strength behind your soft heart.
Be clear, not cruel.
You don’t need a paragraph of backstory. A simple “That doesn’t work for me” is complete and kind.Practice saying “no” without a comma.
Stop adding “...but maybe later” or “...if you really need me.” “No” is a full sentence, use it proudly.Check your comfort level before you commit.
When someone asks something of you, pause and notice how your body reacts. Tension is information. Listen to it.Stay consistent.
Every time you hold the line, you teach people how to treat you, and you remind yourself that your peace matters.Don’t over-explain.
Boundaries are facts, not debates. You don’t need to prove your reasoning. Respect doesn’t require justification.
About the images in this edition
Pre-Storm Roll In
This day, Jax Beach in Florida. I walked for miles searching for and finding sharks teeth before a storm which was rapidly rolling. The shark teeth, small, black, and not easily found. Creating patience and slowing my mind, narrowing in on just one task.
To this day…
This is one of my favorite images of all times. Weird, I know, nothing special about it. But make up your own story, or know the real one. Cony Island, 6am as the sun came up, I watched this man feed the eagles of the sea. A quick conversation later, this is what he has done every morning since his wife passed. The seagulls are his quiet and his moment “with his wife”
This One Time…
I went out to LA. I did not like LA. I rented a car and drove 4 hours up the coast to a friends house ( I photographed their wedding a couple years earlier), they took me in for a couple days. But on the way up, driving the PCH, stopping and taking in what was there. My first, and probably last time I will ever drive the PCH.
The Wild Ponies
Off the coast of Maryland and Virginia are the ponies. The Assateague Island ponies.
Going one early March day (actually went for a couple days) and hanging with these creatures was some of the best days. The quiet, the peace, no other humans. Just me and the ponies… See more of these images here: https://www.artwithtab.com/post/assateague-wild-ponies
A Quick Ask
A quick ask, from me, to you… If you found this newsletter good for your soul, mind, or heart, please consider sharing with a friend or on your socials. It means the world to me and every time I see a new subscriber, my heart shines just a little brighter.
A Final Note
NOTES FROM THE HEART
Live your life. In a way that’s good for your soul. And shine your light on others, lifting them up with any chance you get.
“There is a certain peace that comes with knowing less — and choosing better.”
Until next time,
Keep Shining - Tim
